less business sense than a psych/anthro major

I have written about my hood here in TO a few times before (most notably here) and while I still very much love the area in which I live, I have noticed a very weird new trend concerning new business on the stretch of the Danforth between say Broadview and Jones.  Here are a few imaginative takes on what new business owners are thinking and let’s see if you can find the connection.

1)      “Hey, that gelato place just opened up on the Danforth.  Seems to be doing well.  I should probably open one across the street and a few doors down.”

2)      “Hmmmm…frozen yogurt you say?  Well, we are going into winter, and there is already a place selling this in the neighborhood but I am going to go ahead and try my luck a few doors down.  I am sure there will be enough fro-yo business for both of us…during the Canadian winter.  And I am sure that the well-established Caffe Demetre and Baskin Robbins will not take any piece of the proverbial Danforth frozen treat pie away from us.”

3)      “Burgers?!  Gourmet Burgers?!  There are two such burger bars already open, but I think if I open a third one my business will be through the roof.  You know, because my burger is better than anyone’s and this burger craze is bound to last!”

I think you are getting the idea.  There is also a restaurant location that keeps closing, getting renovated, re-opening, and then closing within a matter of a year.  Unless these places are all just a front for some sort of money laundering scheme, I can only assume that I, a social sciences major, have more business savvy than the yahoos opening up these places.

Is there something that I am just not seeing?  Is the frogurt business model more stable and sound than I realize?  Will these burger places eventually be so ram jammed that people will be thanking their lucky stars a new one happened to open up just down the street?

I don’t have the answers here people and if anything I feel sorry for these business owners who think that they are about to start sleeping on top of a pile of money with many beautiful ladies (I haven’t had a Simpsons reference on here for a while I just realized) when, more likely, they are just a few months away from sleeping on a fold out couch in their parents’ basement.  What are they thinking?!  I think my cat could come up with better investment opportunities.  And in fact, he has!  Contact me directly if you would like to be part of a new and exciting business venture.  I can’t say too much about it as the patent is still pending, but it involves answering the age old question “how can we possibly get our cat’s whiskers their cleanest?”

This is not actually my cat, but trust me, he is just as classy. I am pretty sure he is a wealthy industrialist just mooching off me for the free wet food.


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